laughed so hard, and actually liked it.
go white boy.
Dear Bros,
Fuck off. No girl actually likes your bullshit pickup lines or wingman set ups. We all know what you’re doing. Heads up, we know what we’re doing too. Do you really think you’re the only one that sneaks out in the am and returns home to trash the shit out of whatever “slam piece” you nailed last night? Girls tell each other everything. And I mean everything. Skill, size, performance, your cheesy mid-smash lines, how dirty your bedroom was and how skeeved out we are by the obvious fact that you haven’t washed your sheets since you moved in. Your egos don’t actually make your dick bigger, just FYI. And condoms? Hell YES. Guarantee I’m cleaner than you. How do I know? We actually perform maintenance down there, unlike you evidently.
Get your shit together, channel less asshole, and wash your fucking sheets. While you’re at it, try to become a slightly better person. And do not, repeat, DO NOT try to grind up on a girl if she hasn’t seen your face. Creeper clue #1.
